I'm gonna tell you story..

So you may have heard of this thing called the Olympics. They got the summer olypmics..and the winter ones. Every 2 years we're blessed with some of the finest physical specimens competing at games of talent and prowess. It's awesome. When I talk to people like my friend Kevin (best name ever) and he tells me he's not watching the olympics and could care less, I want to punch him. Right in the gonads. Because they're fantastic.

And this is about sports, in general. Only related to baseball in the sense that baseball is also a drinking game. The olympics are not to be trifled with. To not take them seriously, in any aspect (Olympics, special olympics, elementary school olympics, whatever), would be a dishonor to what they stand for. The pinnacle of human leisure - sport.

And I have found myself recruited onto a beer olympics team, due to a roadtrip to Yarrow, MO and their bar. Which was the only building in sight, and was fantastic. Anyway, the team came to fruition. 5 of the greatest beer drinkers in Kirksville, MO in the last half decade. We've got the experience. We didn't know why we'd been drinking so much from 2005-2010, but now we do. Beer olympics. Right before all of us move away from this shithole for good. Beer. Fucking. Olympics. The culmination of our alcoholism.

So this week we're in training. Because we're not pussyfooting around with this.

We are in this for the sport. For the spirit of competition. We're gonna do this right.

Beer pong, flip cup, pitcher quarters, quarters, and baseball. It always comes down to baseball, doesn't it? The greatest sport to grace our good Earth. And also, a good drinking game.

So we're gonna drink some beer. All day. Every day. And we're gonna win, because the competition are young and oblivious to what we're about to do.